In Search of Worth

I have had times in my life when, honestly, I really did not like myself. And I don’t mean I had these feelings years ago; this is a struggle that I have experienced for too many years until very recently. For so long the enemy has droned his lies in my ears that I am worthless, not good enough, undesirable, boring, awkward, that no one could really like me. And too often I believed him and gave him the sweet satisfaction of seeing me down and out because I truly believed I was a worthless specimen. But God has been doing a work in my heart for the last year and a bit, especially the first half of this year. He dug in places that hurt and took me through a season that was both painful and freeing. Through a difficult time of loneliness last semester, God showed me that I had been placing my worth in others’ opinions of me and that I had been drenching myself in Satan’s lies. I had not been looking to Him for affirmation, love, security and my identity but to people who can never satisfy. When I took my insecurities, loneliness and brokenness to Him, He revealed Himself as my healer, redeemer, faithful Father and best friend. 

Through a difficult time, God was working and pouring His truth into my life. He showed me that my worth lies in Him and Him alone. He told me that He loves me just as I am. That I am loved, chosen, favoured, worthwhile, enough, beautiful, a treasure and that I am His daughter. If you ever feel worthless or not good enough, I want to tell that I know all too well what that is like and even though I am now feeling more secure in my identity in Jesus, I still have many moments of weakness and it was a long battle to get to where I am today. I also want to tell you to stop listening to the enemy’s lies because when we do, we give him the victory. Instead, we need to immerse ourselves in God’s truth and know that when He sees us, He is filled with pride and joy.  We are His daughters and He delights in us. Keep being the beautiful woman He has created you. In my search for worth, I realised that my worth lay in the Creator of the Universe, in the One who calls the stars by name and loves us more than we will ever deserve.

“Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; you are Mine… Since you were precious in My sight, you have been honoured, and I have loved you.”- Isaiah 43: 1,4